In the web...

My first person in the web to the left of me is my dad. He is and always has been a strong force in my life. I take many traits, good and not so good, from my father. The good ones are the ones that propel me to do great things in the world. If he hadn't opened our home to fostering and adopting I wouldn't have thought too much about it. He opened his home and he gave until it probably hurt.  He worked hard. He made sure we had experiences. He thought I could go far and change the world. He always told me he would be on my team. The harder traits I wish not to expose. I will allow those to remain hidden as I want the world to think the best of us. (lacking humility..exposed. :)
He always said, "I will take a bullet for you." I believe him. His strong love permeates the miles now. His strong love then made me confident.

The second person in the web to the right of me is my mother. I included two pictures of her because she is both teacher and nurturer in my life. She instilled my love for the Lord which is a driving force in my life. She continues to be a pillar of faith to me. She also has taught me how to eat to live. That is why, against her wishes I am certain, I put a picture of her eating vegetables. For as long as I can remember she was about health and attaining it. I believe that is why I can balance my life so well due to her example of nutrition and wellness. She is also my comforter and nurturer. She is warm and non judgemental. She is peace and she is joy. She is a light to all. I hope I can be the same to my seven children.
My children love her and she is a very strong component in their webs as well as my father.

The third picture is of my siblings. They count as ONE. My brother John on the far right was a foster brother. We actually adopted him legally when he was 52. He lived with us when I was a very young child. He helped shape my idea of family. Our family is now complete with him as a concrete part of it. We now have his girls and their families. The web for them is bigger and stronger. Each of my siblings played a role in my life as a child. We were all little together and grew up either at war or in peace. Each of them today plays an important role in my life as well.  My sister claims the highest spot as the one I can be my authentic self with abandon. We could have fun on an island with nothing. I have complete and utter acceptance from her. My brothers are pillars of strength for me. Our lives are far away but when I am with them the years and the miles melt and we return to the ease of the relationship. I mourn that loss of the moments due to distance but treasure the ones that I have had. They, too, have become strong components in the webs of my children.

The last picture of the man, Uncle Ron and the lady, Gram. My mother's mom and her brother. My Uncle would have me to visit in Chicago. He was a pretty influential man in my life as he plucked me out of po- dunk Lincoln, IL and took me to the city and always without fail made me feel like the most important person in the world. I  always felt cherished by him. He would buy me things, compliment me, take me to a play or out to dinner...I was always in a fairy tale type existence when I was with him. Special. I do not see him often now. Our lives are far from close but my memories are cherished.
Then there is my Grammie. I couldn't ever imagine life without her. When she was dying I remember asking her how I was going to make it without her and she told me I would heal. I have healed, she was right,  but the hole is there. I have her jewelry and when I wear it I feel close to her. She shined. She was smart and I knew that at a very young age. I wanted to be fancy like her in a classy way and I wanted to be smart..just like her. She also was an example in her faith. She was a strong woman and I miss her terribly. She would take me out to the Magic Pan in Chicago. She drove a baby blue Cadillac  She listened to 8 track tapes of Frank Sinatra and she sang in a very high voice. She smelled good. She was warm. She was like my mom. I am so grateful for her influence in my life. I know she would be proud of me now. I know her memory influences me today.